10 Potentially Irreconcilable Differences

Are there any irreconcilable differences? The University of Washington has more than 35 years of marital research by Dr. John Gottman that determines with greater than a 90 percent accuracy rate what’s going to happen to a relationship over a three-year period.

In a national telephone survey, there were two issues that couples were most likely to report arguing about. What would you guess those two areas are?

ANSWER: Money and Children

Examples of potential irreconcilable differences might include:

• In-Laws & Extended Family Involvement
• Balance Between Home & Work
• Communication Patterns
• Sexual Intimacy
• Personal Habits & Idiosyncrasies
• Sharing Household Responsibilities
• Outside Friendships
• Political Views
• Debt Difficulties
• Disciplining Children

Here is the important takeaway: Differences are inevitable. It’s how you manage the differences that matters. Discuss potential differences in your relationship.

For example: Money

1. Discuss how money was managed in your family.
2. How would you want money managed in your marriage?
3. Discuss: “What does money mean to you?”

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